12/13

This is the time.

The time I dread most of pregnancy.

A transition.

A "good" week.

A marker.

The "safe zone" is in sight.

This is also the time I lost my first baby.

This is the time I thought I was losing Jack.

This is the time God proves Himself faithful... no matter the outcome.

I might hold my breath a little but I continue to put on Hope and Faith and Trust.

This is the time I pray.

This is the time I really press in.

This is the time I press on.

How do I love thee? Let me count the ways...

My sister Grace is doing a "Why you love your husband" MckLinky Monday. Here's my attempt to squeeze all the innumerable reasons down to 17. We've known each other for 17 years and have been married for 12 this year so I will countdown from 17. These are in no particular order and are just 16 of an infinite number... some that I have yet to discover.

17. Nice. He's a genuinely nice guy. Not over the top salesman nice, but just a kind, simple, thoughtful, honest to goodness, nice guy.The kind of guy you want to be around. Not full of himself or an authority on every subject under the sun. But someone who is just as interested in hearing about you as he is about telling you about his kids. And if he says he'll be there at 5, he shows up at 4:45.

16. Mr. Steady. He is still the same sweet boy I fell in love with, so thoughtful and kind.

15. Rule-follower. Drives me nuts sometimes but overall a very admirable quality. He offers a great balance to my rule-breaking personality. He thinks black and white, while I enjoy the subjective.

14. Hardworker. I've never known a man who works harder than Nate. He loves big projects and learning new things. At work, his work ethic has meant several promotions and he's the "go to guy." I am so proud of the way he has managed a career change and excelled in this new field.

13. Silly. He thinks he's funnier than me. Isn't that so cute.

12... Years of blissful marriage. We had a couple rough spots but nothing earth shattering and every hard time has brought us closer together. He doesn't isolate during rough times he pulls me closer and we work together. He also looks me in the eye and says "I will never leave you" and then usually follows that up with some funny statement like "who else would make me cookies at 10:30 at night."

11. Confidence. He is confident and leads with confidence. Whenever I worry or fret he always in confident and sure that everything will be fine. He reminds me constantly of God's faithfulness.

10. Humble. He is a gentle, humble man who always thinks the best of others and does not ascribe greater importance to himself.

9. Loyal. This goes hand in hand with committed. He doesn't back down when a promise is made. When I am mad at someone he tries to get me to see things from their perspective. I also see this quality a lot in relation to Diet Coke. He won't touch Diet Pepsi. See even in his soft drink choice he shows unwavering loyalty.

8. Supportive. He always encourages me to pursue my passions, develop hobbies, do things I enjoy, and so on. Right now that means supporting me while I work one day a week at a job I love. He also provide well for our family so that it is our choice that I get to work and not a necessity. After my one day, the rest of week I stay home and teach our kids. I get the best of both worlds! He loves that we homeschool!

7. Tall. Nate is really tall. I am really short. There's over a foot difference in height between us. That makes me feel secure. I don't really worry a lot about safety when he's around. He can hold his own and he would never let anyone hurt me. This is a big deal to me because I trust him implicitly. Oh and that picture at the start... I'm wearing heels and standing on my tiptoes per the photographers request.

6. Gentle. He might be big but really he wouldn't hurt a fly. Actually he hurts lady bugs though... and doesn't get mad when I see one and scream because I thought it was something much larger and scarier. Peripheral vision can really throw off the size of bugs.

5. Quiet. We are both pretty quiet people. We are friendly and talk to others but really if we had our way we like quiet. I like that I can be with Nate and feel comfortable in silence. Or we can sit and talk for hours about nothing or big things.

4. Besties. There's no one else I'd rather spend time with and same with him. Even after 17 years we most enjoy each other's company. We love to talk about our kids, our past, our future and dream together. We talk and text each other all day long. We save our emails as our "love letters" to each other. Because even a grocery list is a love letter if it means I don't have to haul 3 kids out in the rain to get sour cream. I love to hear about his sports exploits and his thought process on home improvements. We love to dream about life after the kids leave home and all the things we want to do. We talk about what kind of grandparents and in-laws we want to be. We love trying new things together... food, sports, travel. We count down until it's us again... still a lot of years to go but 50 is the new 30!

3. History. We have a rich history. We've been through a lot together and when we look back and see God's faithfulness we know we can trust God with our present and our future because of His faithfulness in our past. We also have built a strong foundation of trust and friendship that has helped us through hard times and through the occasional boredom of our daily routines.

2. Daddy. This man LOVES his boys! He is crazy about them and is exactly what each one needs. He knows Luke's perfectionist tendencies and encourages him to do his best rather than beat himself up when it's not to his (Luke's own) standard. He knows K's tender spirit and doesn't cut him down for it but instead nurtures that tender side of him. He knows that I hate poop and changes Jack's poopies! He models for them every day what a husband, father, man and follower of Jesus should look like. He sacrifices and works hard and is dedicated. They work alongside him and want to be just like him... I hope they are just like him. He also teaches them to treat me with respect, gives them money to take me on dates and encourages them to be gentleman at all times, to all people.

1. My Man! He's mine. He's perfectly suited to me and our personalities complement each other well. Even when we argue we typically end up laughing because it just doesn't fit us. That can be really annoying sometimes when I want to be mad but I can't stop laughing. His smile still gives me butterflies and he is the only one I have eyes for. Oh and his eyes... AMAZING! He is exactly what I need. I wouldn't want him any other way than just as he is. The Nate who thinks before he speaks, but never leaves me hanging. The one who knows me better than I know myself. The one I trust with my heart. The only one who I can imagine living this life with. The one I trust to answer me honestly but still with such grace and wisdom and love that even criticism seems to build me up. Overall, this man is amazing. He never had a good role model for what a man should be. He sought God and pursued righteousness. That is the BEST model he could have and he amazes me every day!

I love you Nate! I could go on and on and on but all you need to know is that you drive me crazy... in a good way!

Good-bye HFC & PHO: Breakfast edition

Nate and I have been talking about getting rid of high fructose corn syrup and partially-hydrogenated oils but didn't know where to start. So I have come up with a bit of a plan to phase things out slowly... meal by meal. Rather than taking an "all or nothing" approach I am starting with breakfast.

First, I evaluated what we would normally eat. This largely consists of cereal, toast, frozen waffles, yogurt and occasionally french toast sticks for Luke only. The kids only drink milk and water so that's easy enough. The french toast sticks are out now and a lot of my favorite cereals as well.

So what is IN? Cheerios... all kinds. They have no HFCS and are made with whole grains. A very healthy choice and the kids really like them. Even the Aldi knock-off brand isn't bad but the name brand is actually better. We can keep the toast but I am in the market for a bread made without HFCS that is whole grain. We switched to a spreadable butter that is YUMMY and made only with cream, canola oil and salt I believe. The frozen waffles are OK (No HFCS) for every once in awhile.

I am still exploring other options but for now this would really be fine with me and the kids. They are pretty routine with their breakfast requests so this "menu" would work for us. We don't do pop-tarts and breakfast bars so that makes things easier. Of course, fresh fruit or homemade pastries are also acceptable options. And we will NEVER give up Lamars!

Mother's Day

OK so I am not the best at blogging and keeping up but hey it's just me so who cares:

Marjie, are you offended at the lack of frequent posting?

No I am not. I know you are busy and pregnant and feeling yucky. You take all the time you need.

Thank you I will!


Ahhhhhh... now back to Mother's Day. Really I think most Mother's would enjoy a nice breakfast and a break from their kids. :) I got to enjoy a donut and a day with my kids! And I wouldn't have changed a single thing about my day! Nothing beats a Lamar's Long John. My people know the key to my heart!

We had soccer games and a BBQ. Oh and it was about 20 degrees and 100mph winds. Maybe that's an exaggeration but it certainly didn't feel like May.

I love watching the boys play soccer and baseball. I think Kaden's legs were made for soccer. He runs on his tiptoes and that works well for his balance and kicking. He scores A LOT of goals... his average is about 7 per game. Luke is very intense and plays every sport with his tongue hanging out. So cute! Jack loves to watch them play and will sit and clap the whole game.

All I wanted for Mother's Day was a lounge chair for the deck. The boys got me a great chair and picked out Jelly Belly jelly beans in all my favorite flavors. Kaden picked out a new flag for our outside flagpole. They also got me the sweetest cards. I felt very blessed. I love my boys!!!!!!!!!!

We had our moms (and in town family) over for a BBQ and announced our news. I guessed their reactions prior to the get together and I was SPOT ON! Inflections, words, facial expressions.... I was sooooooo right. Nate gave me a pat on the back. It was our secret. I am holding onto my news for a bit longer and had already shared it with my closest friends and my sisters but I am starting to let it leak.... like to all of you. My overwhelming following. Quiet for now.